She doesn’t like it when someone interferes in her personal life. Others may love it when you ask them about their relationships, but she gets very defensive. We’re all different you see.
Many well-meaning people will sagely tell you that we’re all unique, that we have our own peculiarities and idiosyncrasies. This makes you believe that no two people are alike just like no two snowflakes are alike.
Then there are others who insist that alike or not, we’re all snowflakes after all. They tell you that we’re all the same.
Each one of us is unique, just like everyone else
We, humans, are born with some hard-wired behaviors that are a part of our genetic heritage. These are the behaviors that we demonstrate just because we are humans or because of our gender. These are the default settings that we’re all born with. So, in a way, nobody is born a clean slate.
This fact alone has largely made the study of mind possible. If everyone’s subconscious worked differently, we wouldn’t have known whatever little we know about it today.
Then there’s another category of behaviors known as learned behaviors. As the name suggests, we are not born with these behaviors but learn them from our environment. These are what make each one of us unique.
No two people are raised in exactly the same set of circumstances and so no two people have the same set of beliefs. Even identical twins differ in their learned behaviors due to different life experiences.
So why does a girl become a tomboy? The reasons can be plenty but they all revolve around one thing- a disliking the female identity.
Maybe she always saw females being ill-treated to the point that her mind motivated her to avoid acting like a female just so she could avoid the ill-treatment herself. Or maybe she admired the role of her father as a caregiver much more than she did of her mother.
Another reason why girls can become tomboys is when the parents treat the male child more favorably. In this case, the girl’s mind thinks that by acting boyishly, she can get more favors.
|Tomboys prefer to hang out with guys and hate all things girly|
Another good example of a learned behavior overcoming an inborn behavior would be that of suicide. Even though we’re hard-wired to behave in ways that ensure our survival, the beliefs that we pick up in this world and the emotions that they generate can be so powerful that they can override our most primitive evolutionary programming.
Hanan Parvez (M.B.A., M.A. Psychology) has written 300+ articles at www.psychmechanics.com, a blog with over 3 million views and 100k monthly visitors. His work has been featured on Forbes, Business Insider, Reader’s Digest, and Entrepreneur.