‘Am I the problem in my family?’ Quiz


Conflicts are interesting but complex and stressful phenomena. Familial conflicts can be especially stressful because we depend on our families for our essential needs. The stakes are as high as they can be.

When a conflict arises between two parties, usually both have a role in causing and escalating it. Other times, families have high-conflict personalities who are prone to starting and escalating conflicts.

Often, these high-conflict people have little or no awareness about how they cause and contribute to conflicts. They likely have unresolved psychological issues.

Healthy vs unhealthy conflict

Conflict is a natural and inevitable part of human existence. How you handle conflict, however, makes it healthy or unhealthy. The test you’re about to take isn’t designed for people who can resolve conflicts in a healthy way.

It’s meant for those who struggle with conflict management– who’ve come to believe they’re the problem in their family.

This belief may be warranted or not. You might be the problem, or you may have been scapegoated. This test will help you figure out where you stand. It’ll tell you how much you’re contributing to the conflicts in your family.

The higher the score, the more likely it is that you’re the problem.

Taking the ‘Am I the problem in my family?’ Quiz

This test consists of a 5-point scale ranging from Strongly agree to Strongly disagree. It’s for those who can reflect on their behavior, put their ego aside, and answer honestly. 

If you think you lack that ability, you can bring in someone close to you to do this test on your behalf. They can think of you as they go through the items.

The test is confidential; we don’t store or share your results.

Am I the problem in my family? Quiz

1. I use guilt, shame, and emotional blackmail to manipulate my family members.

2. I deliberately deny events that occurred to create confusion in my family members.

3. I tend to invade the privacy of my family members and overshare personal information.

4. I'm unconcerned with the feelings, needs, and opinions of my family members.

5. I've been accused of being abusive by multiple family members.

6. My family members seem to be walking on eggshells around me.

7. I have tried to damage the reputation of a family member.

8. I impose unrealistic demands upon my family members.

9. I hardly take responsibility for my behaviors.

10. I am not the one to compromise.

11. I have to be always right.

12. I've been called 'entitled'.

13. I avoid family responsibilities and relationships.

14. I have turned family members against each other.

15. My family members fight less with each other than with me.